Comedians have often mocked the “policeman style”

With the “subsequently” of the agents of authority, we have created a real cliché of the literature of the report. But the reality is even tastier than the legend. Here, in fact, are some extracts from police reports published by a professional journal. They prove to us that Agent 64 and Constable Labourbourax have much more originality than their pale imitators.
Let us quote at random: “He was following a funeral... He was crippled in one leg which was made of wood... A serious illness caused his reason to fall into dementia... We do not know who the brother of the 'other... He had been a public prosecutor under the Empire... She has been a widow since the death of her husband... Her occupations consist of cleaning for a Mr. X. and a Mr. Y., both deceased... He had on him a sum of 20 francs in 5 franc notes, including one of 10... Although she claims to be in need, she has a physique that does honor to her type of diet... An innumerable crowd, estimated at 1,500 people... Very calm entertainment... He has a hairless beard... He has been out of work for three months, these are his only resources... He is employed at M. Lavatory, hairdresser, 24, rue du Faubourg-Saint-Denis... The information collected on his account is most favorable, however he is represented as lazy and a drunkard... etc.

Admit that the “in the manner of” do not have this flavor. We don't invent these words. Why doesn't the police headquarters periodically publish these models of humor, which sleep, ignored, in the dust of its green boxes? And why wouldn't we distribute prizes to the most brilliant winners of special eloquence in the constabulary?

EMILE